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Chewbacca Arrested While Campaigning For Darth Vader

This article is over 9 years old and may contain outdated information

That’s not a moon, that’s a polling station.

It’s been an fascinating year for election news worldwide – Justin Trudeau just became Canada’s Prime Minister while Donald Trump is predicted to win the Republican primary. But the strangest election update actually comes from Ukraine, where Star Wars‘ Chewbacca was just arrested for driving mayoral candidate Darth Vader to a polling station. And let me tell you, it’s not easy to arrest a Wookie, requiring four officers to wrestle him into a police van and escort him to a court hearing.

No, I’m not making any of this up.

Darth Vader represents the Internet Party of Odessa, Ukraine, where he legally changed his name to reflect a geek-friendly platform. But when Vader was taken to the polling station by a Chewie-costume wearing driver, they may have breached Ukrainian law – specifically one stating that candidates may not canvass on an election day. When “Chewbacca” refused to present documentation to police, he was arrested on the spot. Did nobody remember that you’re supposed to let the Wookie win?

Chewie was taken to court – where he appeared in-costume – and fined an amount equivalent to £5. Yet Chewie refused to pay, stating “Huuguughghg huurh huurh hnnnhrrhhh uughguughhhghghghhhgh wrrhw aguhwwgggghhh aarrragghuuhw aarrragghuuhw huuguughghg huuguughghg uggguh huuguughghg.” (Roughly translated as “[Chewie’s] funds are in an intergalactic bank that has no branches on this planet.”)

But what about the election itself, you ask? As Master Yoda said, the Dark Side of the Force is not stronger than Light. Darth Vader was allegedly prevented from voting because his name wasn’t on the electoral list. Imagine that – the second-in-command of a galactic dictatorship felled by democratic bureaucracy. There’s a lesson somewhere in there.

The final results will be counted by Nov. 4, so perhaps this Sith will have his revenge. In the meantime, I don’t want to be around when Chewie tells Han who he voted for this year.

Source: The Independent

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