Final Fantasy VII Rebirth has one major shortcoming: its moogles look pretty freaky, and they’re also bullies. And they’re evil. Alright, that last bit might not be accurate, but I will spread my truth anyways.
Since the game has launched, the Rebirth community has also started picking up on just how bizarre Rebirth’s version of the moogles is. They’re being called “freaky little guys,” and more recently, Twitter/X user Chaoko has also created a quick graphic urging fellow FFVII enjoyers to please recognize the difference between a cute moogle and Miguel, who is really just a criminal who wants to lead you down a dark, dark path.
Yes, you read that right. The things you think are moogles in FFVII Rebirth are actually just a man named Miguel in disguise. As the factually accurate graphic would suggest, Miguel does not care for you and would straight up call a hit on you.
The Twitter thread then spirals into other users sending Chaoko pictures of other moogle iterations and asking them what these moogles would be named. There’s Michael Jordan, Mabel, Morgan… the list goes on.
Look, the point is, it ain’t just me spreading the evil FFVII Rebirth moogle gospel. I still stand by my opinion that the mogstool mini-game is easily the worst of the bunch in the entire game, and the moogles looking extra furry and creepy also doesn’t help their case. Oh if only we didn’t need the Moogle Emporium for our Manuscripts…
Final Fantasy VII Rebirth is now available on PS5.
Published: Mar 6, 2024 08:08 pm