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Pathfinder: Wrath of the Righteous cultists incompetent idiots, true to life and love it

Pathfinder: Wrath of the Righteous’s Cultists Are Incompetent Idiots, and It’s Perfect

I canā€™t get enough of Pathfinder: Wrath of the Righteousā€™s incompetent, idiotic cultists ā€” and Iā€™m not just talking about the experience points for dispatching them. Instead, itā€™s the non-fatal interactions Iā€™ve had with them that have been such an unexpected but side-splittingly ridiculous source of entertainment.

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Itā€™s not that Pathfinder: Wrath of the Righteous plays everything for comedy; it is, after all, about a realm being overtaken by unholy forces ā€” real ā€œworld hanging in the balanceā€ stuff. And there are some spell-flinging, jacked-up cultists who are more than a match for your party, as well as ones who arenā€™t remotely willing to talk. But Iā€™ve met enough red-robed bunglers to make it clear that the Cult of Baphomet and its sister organizations have next to no quality control. Got a pulse? Youā€™re in.

The first time I met them, I saw a city guard swap sides just because one of his friends had signed up, which the other cult members were absolutely fine with. ā€œAt last we can see the kind of mind that swears allegiance to a demon lord,ā€ one of your party disdainfully remarks, after a later encounter. Yes, a lot of cultists will straight up try to murder you, but you talk to enough of them to underline what thundering imbeciles they are.

Iā€™m aware that real-life cults are very, very good at reeling people in, but it becomes apparent that half of Pathfinder: Wrath of the Righteousā€™s crimson-clad clowns signed up because they thought the name Baphomet sounded cool. I ran into a researcher who, as I watched, quizzed a group of cultists about their demonic overlord. It was absolutely basic stuff, the equivalent of asking a Christian what the symbol of their faith is, but they hadnā€™t got a clue.

Pathfinder: Wrath of the Righteous cultists incompetent idiots, true to life and love it

I could have stepped in front of her and put my sword through their necks, ruining her work, but showing the cultists up was so, so much more satisfying. So I stood there, interrupting and getting every question right (with, Iā€™ll admit, a little saving and reloading) while they fumbled the answers and turned even redder than their robes, which I half expected to have ā€œMake Evil Great Againā€ on the back.

However, itā€™s not just the grunts who are short on foresight, brain cells, or both, so the explanation that they were recruited as cannon fodder doesnā€™t hold true. Several higher-ups are just as inept, one so much that he decides to safeguard his cultā€™s scriptures by eating them. He ended up choking, leaving me with the choice of whether to assist or just laugh like a drain as he keeled over. I chose the latter option. Evil? Maybe. Extremely funny? Definitely.

The outcomes of these encounters vary depending on the various skills youā€™ve put points into, so your experience may vary, especially on a second playthrough. If your characterā€™s a bit of a smooth talker, try making a bruiser the next time around; letā€™s see if their doctrine stands up to the steely gaze of a seven-foot barbarian.

Not every line in Pathfinder: Wrath of the Righteous is voiced, but the dialogue and descriptions are just sublime. The aforementioned cult member ā€œballs the pages up in his fist and shoves them into his mouth, then begins furiously chewing like a hamster.ā€ I wonā€™t spoil any of the other idiot-based interactions, but theyā€™re every bit as vivid and nearly always as much fun.

The one downside to all this absurdity is you might feel a bit guilty about skewering the cultistsā€™ less talkative comrades. But hey, Iā€™m sure Baphomet will have a warm welcome for them.


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Chris McMullen
Chris McMullen is a freelance contributor at The Escapist and has been with the site since 2020. He returned to writing about games following several career changes, with his most recent stint lasting five-plus years. He hopes that, through his writing work, he settles the karmic debt he incurred by persuading his parents to buy a Mega CD. Outside of The Escapist, Chris covers news and more for GameSpew. He's also been published at such sites as VG247, Space, and more. His tastes run to horror, the post-apocalyptic, and beyond, though he'll tackle most things that aren't exclusively sports-based. At Escapist, he's covered such games as Infinite Craft, Lies of P, Starfield, and numerous other major titles.
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